Saturday, May 6, 2017

Ups and Downs

Assalammualaikum J

This is my story after a week maybe. I’m sharing this to motivate myself and as a reminder that things are not going easy always. It has ups and downs.
Is it okay for me to share about my result? I find it’s hard if I’m not telling the truth. The story will be confusing. Let’s start it! *kind of excited but T_T*

To be honest, I’m targeting straight A’s. I know it’s hard because during the exam I never had that result. Hahahaha. I’m challenging myself but of course I also had another target which is seem logic to achieve it. I put another target which is more than 7A’s. People keep saying target the highest one so that if you can’t get it at least you get the nearest one. Shoot for the sky if you don’t get it at least you will get the star.-Pn.Hasni told us from what she heard- *I’m translating it and I’m not sure if it sky or star or moon but it something like that.*

On 16 March 2017, SPM result came out. Phewwwww. The time has come. Teacher calls the name who gets 8A’s and above. I’m waiting…… Next, teacher calls those who were straight A’s. I’m waiting….. I’M CRYING LIKE A BABY T_T :p There’s no my name. Okay, let’s move on to the next target which is 7A’s. I’m lining up to take the result from my class teacher. Suddenly, there was an announcement “People who are getting 6A’s and above please give your name in front of the hall and get the invitation card to Majlis Anugerah Cemerlang.” Okay. Pn. Puziah gave my result. I got…… Say Alhamdulillah first before I’m crying or feel like does not grateful. I got 1A+ 3A 1A- 5B+ J

ALHAMDULILLAH J Truthfully, that is THE BEST RESULT OF MINE. Yeahhh. Well, I’m actually sad for not reaching my target but there’s always HIKMAH. Teachers asked my result and I will say 5A and smile even though I had cried badly while hugging Dekya. Hahahaha Then, Ustazah Huzaimah asked me. Why my answers towards Ustazah “5A jaa?" Ustazah “Jaa?” I’ll be like “Ustazah, saya syukur saya syukur” HAHAHAHAHA Well, at that time and the whole day I’m realizing. Kihkihkih

However, people always said don’t look a person who gets more than us. Your gratitude will be lost. Still remember the award ceremony? For sure, I’m not deserved to go for the award ceremony. To be honest, I’m looking the others person's results. The main reason I am sad because I cannot be with my classmate there. Second, there were many hostel students there. I had a big dream to go up on the stage with them. Its look like my sustenance was not there. I’m praying hard to go there with them but mine was not included. On that day, I need to keep calm and don’t acts like a childish. I decided to log out all of my social media account. I do not want to hurt others.

My heart keeps hurt because most all of my classmates were going there. Other than that, I am one of the persons who achieved the award in PT3. While looking the others members who also received the award in PT3 and also SPM. I’m very down. I’m not trying to be ripple or what. As I said, I’m expressing my feeling. I know why Allah gives this to me. It has been 2 month from that day. I think I had move on. Why I’m still sharing this story even I had move on? Next paragraph I TOLD YOU!

I have a lot to share of my feelings but I think I need to make it short. Actually, I want to share what that I had motivate myself. To be honest, I’m not motivating myself in one day but it almost until now. Yes, I had move on but….. I just want to always remind myself.

Here is what I’m thinking. Allah had given me a lot of achievement in studies. I think the best moment for a child of their achievement is UPSR. A child takes time to move on more than teenagers. You can think that there were more chances in future but a child is full of emotion. Alhamdulillah, Allah gave me the good results. Even though, my name was not listed in SBP or MRSM but I grateful to stay in SeNi. *please be proud SeNi’s students* Secondly, I’m not targeting for PT3 because on that time the system is still new and we were still confusing but Alhamdulillah Allah gave me more than what I expected.*not straight* With the result, teachers let me stay in that perghhhh class. It is extremely hard to fight with them. In Form 5, many times I got 20 and above (i mean in class) T_T. HAHAHAHAHA Just focusing on positive sides. When I’m blurring they can help me and the healthy competition even in the end I’m still thinking that I’m lose but never mind. Just keep the good memories in our mind.

In SPM Allah test me. Allah tests because He wants us to always pray for Him. I should be grateful for all the achievement that I had received. Maybe for this time, I did not get from what I want because Allah knew that maybe I’ll be riddle. I’m hoping I’m not like that. People can change right? 5B+ is a moral for me to more hardworking. THIS TIME I CAN THINK THAT THERE WERE MORE CHANCES IN FUTURE. If I cannot be what I want maybe I’ll awarded a perfect husband. Ehemmmmmm out of story :p 

It’s actually hard to express feeling here. Typing in English. Blerghhhh -,- You want to hear with more feel like I want to lecture ohh you can contact me through Twitter @nrlasyiqinftni. DM me and I’ll whatsapp to you using voice. HAHAHAHA Actually, what I want to share my thought I had express it to Hidayah through whatsapp. It was when both of us cannot move on. Hehehehehe. #promotepromote :P *DM need followback ask followback* Hewhewhew 

 Please don’t misunderstand. Yes, I can write it in the diary *I had written* but I’m sharing here to express my feeling. Otherwise, I need some motivation. Things are going hard for me to motivate myself. There are maybe some people like me. Receive more achievement then one day Allah test you. I hope all of us can be positive. PRAY THE BEST FOR ALL OF US <3 



FarahRara said...

Hi my lil fatini! To be honest, i'm so proud of you. For me, 5A 5B+ is not easy to get. And yeah, you did it! You have done your best sissy ;) Remember, Allag will give what you need, not what you want. So, don't worry. Have faith in Allah. I know maybe this sounds a lil bit cliche, but yeah I just want to express what I felt too. Your result is way better than me, so heads up my dear! Don't look back. I pray for you & our friends to be success in life. Aamiin ✨ Keep updating your blog, sister. Im going to be your 'pembaca tegar' after this �� Much love from me, princess ❤

Queen Terror said...

Wuuuu. I dont know why. But, wuuuuu👏 Keep motivated you self babe. You know, Allah the only ones who knows better where and when and what kind our 'rezeki' are. Keep positive and beautiful babe 🎈